3 things I forgot to write about yesterday
1 ) Joss doesn’t handle dealing with 2 small bottles of wine very well, as her shorts can verify whilst on the plane - I fear that this mistake may cost me in the future
2) Despite us talking many many times about singing “Oh Canada” whilst in Canada Joss gets easily embarrassed by the experience and quickly stuffs an aeroplane (un)complimentary pillow in your face. More of a note to me I guess
3) The taxi driver was a lunatic- texting whilst driving and weaving in and out of lanes. Good job the car looked like a tank
Now, onto today:
We walked to St Lawrence market as I figured there would be somewhere for breakfast
We passed many beautiful buildings and streets and some of the less sought after establishments, at least when I’m here for a romantic holiday
I also found my spiritual and intellectual home
At the market we found a cafe
We ordered the “Grand slam” breakfast each
That sounds small, right?
No, it wasn’t
Coupled with that, my tea was served in a light bulb, what’s that about?
We then looked around the market and the thing of note for me was the size of the meats
We then found the olive counter
Joss wasn’t pleased
I mean yes, this might be the best moment of the holiday for her
We then walked, just for something to do, to the distillery district
We found something to do
I saw this on the menu - I don’t think it needs a punchline ......
We then walked round the boutique shops of the distillery district where I briefly stopped to be a wedding photographer
And also stopped to prevent Joss buying any of these monstrosities
We then decided to walk to the water but after walking 10 minutes in the 30+ degrees we aborted that mission and decided to go back to the hotel
On the way back we stumbled upon a theatre and accidentally bought 2 tickets for Annie for tonight - yeah - after what we’ve been drinking, seems about right
After that we sensibly went back to the hotel
No, that’s not what happened
We found a bar with England football pictures on the wall and a signed Giggs’ shirt and drank some more - what could be the harm?
So, we get to the theatre and not only do I pay £5 for a glass of wine, not only do I order another 2 for intermission, but they are this big
<
We get to our seats and Joss is on the end of the line on a separate chair
I would have laughed but her seat looked very comfy and had a distinct height advantage
The first half was full of kids with terrible accents
Both Joss and I were roaring with laughter throughout
Then came intermission and not even arguably, the best thing happened
A kid of about 10 years old and 100 lbs pushed a guy about 45 years old and about 200lbs and the man whines like a baby
“Is this child yours? He really pushed me and didn’t say sorry”. I laughed so much I almost dropped my thimble of wine
Even better, when we got back to our seats he was right next to them looking at his phone
“Are you ok Joss” I asked “there’s talk of a small kid running amok in the foyer “
We were both crying
He made it worse by telling his mate how he “knew you can’t chastise other people’s kids but he just ‘lost it’ “
I have honestly not heard us laugh that much ever
The second half was much the same as the first - bad accents and underlings that could sing and dance better than the main events
Still, I enjoyed it. Yes the intermission helped, but I enjoyed it nonetheless
We walked back to the hotel
Feeling hungry we ordered food we were too tired to eat and drink, which we drank
A splendid day with an ending neither of us would have bet on at its beginning
All what a holiday should be
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